You already “know” you can do anything you set your mind to. You’ve probably heard it since birth. The “Girl Power” generation and all, right? Well, that doesn’t mean you ALWAYS believe it. Maybe a percentage of your time, at best. And, that doesn’t mean you’re “confident”. But, would you believe me if I say you CAN be?
Confidence is a mindset. A badge of honor. A way of life. It’s a belief or set of beliefs, we hold about ourselves and our place in the world. Confidence and conceit are very different things. I’m not saying you need to walk around as if the world owes you things. But, you can walk around knowing that you deserve the good and beautiful things the world has for you. See the distinction there?
Confident people, especially confident women, are truly unstoppable when we put our minds to something. Those self-doubts can’t survive very long. The outside messages of doubt, shame, and ignorance can’t be fueled to consume us when we know our worth to our core. While there isn’t a recipe for cultivating confidence, I have found that there are some great places to start.
7 Habits to Help You Achieve (and Sustain) Self Confidence
Perhaps you think affirmations are cheesy. I get it. But, there is evidence to show that they actually work! You can find lists of affirmations on Pinterest or by doing a quick Google. Or, you can write your own! What are the top 10-20 things you need yourself to know and believe, every single day, in order to feel like the queen you are? Write them down and read them out loud every single morning. I wrote about imposter syndrome last month, and included a shortlist of affirmations you might be curious to try!
Curate your crew.
Do the people around you make you feel good about yourself? Yes? GREAT. That’s what they should be doing. If your answer is anything other than YES, we need to talk. You get a choice. No one is entitled to your time or attention except you. (Okay, maybe your kids, but that’s a whole other thing.) Whether it’s your friends, family, or even your neighbors, you can choose to spend time with them or not. You can have a say in sho you let in your circle. And, say goodbye to anyone who treats you poorly. Who makes you feel unloved or unworthy of love. Your people should lift you up and allow you to help lift them. “A rising tide lifts all boats.” You get to determine your own personal boundaries!
I wrote about this last week, but your daily routine is an anchor for yourself to reset and refocus each day. It doesn’t need to be long, complex, or even formal. But, it does need to be YOURS. Not the kids’. Not your partner’s. And, not just brushing your teeth and drinking coffee. (Why do we do that in that order anyway?) You might incorporate some of those aforementioned affirmations into the mix. Perhaps a personal development or positive podcast. Read a chapter of a book. Take a walk. Prepare your meals for the day mindfully. (More on that later) Journal your thoughts. Whatever makes YOU feel more centered and complete is worth doing as a part of your daily routine. Make it yours.
Fuel your body.
Your body needs food, water, movement, and rest. Don’t deprive it of any of these things. Yes, I know many of us struggle deeply with body image issues. And, it can take a toll on our overall self-confidence and even wellbeing. But, you do not have to suffer or punish yourself to feel confident. Make deliberate and kind choices for your body. It is doing incredible things for you. Be grateful to it for allowing you to keep going, every single day.
Guard your media intake.
Social. News. Podcasts. Apps. Whatever it is for you. Give yourself a limit. A timer. A cut-off. The comparison game is NOT your friend. Plus, we’re constantly comparing our outtakes to someone else’s highlight reel. Not a fair compare. So, do what you need and want to do with your media and do it with intentionality. Don’t let the extra noise creep in when it doesn’t have your best interests at heart.
No, you don’t have to become a yogi. Mindfulness is most basically defined as “moment to moment awareness with non-judgment”. Start by paying attention to what you are doing. Be 100% where you are when you are there. Not thinking about everything else you could be doing or have fine already. Take a deep breath. Then, take the time to notice those thoughts you have. Are they serving you? Are they helpful or harmful? If the latter, cut them off! (Cue the Selena Gomez song) They don’t deserve your mental real estate. You have too much amazing work to do. Present those negative or intrusive thoughts with their official walking papers. Buh bye. Then, let the positive ones flow through, and fill you with love and light.
Therapy. Counseling. Coaching.
I don’t care what you call it. I don’t even care who you see, as long as they are the right fit for YOU. Would I be honored to help you with your self-confidence journey? YES. But, ultimately, I just want you to feel it. Deep in your soul. Because you’re that amazing.
Begin Counseling for Self Confidence in Miramar, FL
If you are looking for a therapist who specializes in helping women, look no further. Enid is here to support your mental health journey. To begin therapy for women in Broward County in-person or for online therapy in Florida, follow these three steps:
Contact Counseling Solutions of Boward to schedule your free 20-minute consultation on a video platform,
Meet with Enid and get to know her!
Feel more confident and secure with your life now.
Other Services Offered at Counseling Solutions of Broward:
In addition to providing counseling for self-confidence, Enid De Jesus offers a variety of mental health services at her counseling clinic in Broward County, FL. Her goal is to create lasting transformative change and growth in your life. So, she offers anxiety treatment, depression treatment, counseling for imposter syndrome, after divorce counseling, relationship counseling for one, and co-dependency treatment. For more information on counseling, please check out her what to expect page or contact her counseling office.