Fulfillment. What does that even mean? How do I find “fulfillment”?
Then, how do I keep it, once I finally found it? Is it something you have to hold onto for fear of losing it again? Something that stays put? A consistently moving target I’m doomed to chase forever without actually catching?
Chances are, if you’re reading this, you might feel some kind of way about your life. Perhaps one or more of the thoughts about have crossed your mind? Same. But, I can assure you that fulfillment is actually possible. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. But, you can have it too.
Finding fulfillment starts with your mindset.
Your mind is the strongest tool you have. You can use it as a weapon against yourself or others. Or, you can choose to use it to build, refine, create, shape, and sculpt. To truly craft the life YOU desire. The life you deserve. What an incredible gift our minds are!
So, how can I build beliefs that help achieve and sustain fulfillment?
While I believe this can be a simple practice, it is not always easy. Everyday stressors can add up. Our minds don’t always play fair. Imposter syndrome, negative self-talk, and toxic patterns or people can create a perfect storm to derail us at any given point. You might have the perfect morning routine, be feeling like the warrior woman you are clearly are. But, then a thought. A text. A memory. An email. A song…something creeps in. Anything to pull your focus and fierceness. A little nudge to crumble your carefully constructed castle of cards.
When you feel truly, completely fulfilled from WITHIN, your castle is made of concrete instead of cards.
Fulfillment is not a fad. Finding Fulfillment is a long-game.
An intense practice with a lifelong maintenance plan. Don’t let scare you though. It’s totally worth the effort now to exceed your wildest expectations.
Here’s my five-step formula to build and sustain true fulfillment:
Setting and enforcing healthy boundaries with yourself and others
Essentially, this means having a “do not cross” line and sticking to it. Boundaries aren’t always comfortable to put up, but they are SO worth it. They become your own personal policy. Your own set of standards by which you hold yourself and others. Boundaries can protect your time, your energy, your space, whatever you want. Then, it’s important to clearly communicate those boundaries. Finally, consistently enforce them when needed.
Life-long, continuous education and learning
No! This does NOT mean you must go out and get your Ph.D. Or, a second Master’s degree. Or, whatever that next step would be for you. What IS important, however, is to find what lights your fire and give it a try. Do you want to learn a new language? Hone a craft you’ve not touched in ages? What about reading or listening to the latest best-seller novel? Are your podcasts teaching you anything or helping you learn and grow? This is all about “leveling up” your life. The greatest minds have spent time not only learning from others but then sharing their knowledge. You can, too.
Being comfortable in and accepting your body
Get cozy in your skin, sister. You wear it every day. While I absolutely know and understand why this can be hard for so many of us, it is absolutely critical to know in your core that YOU are enough. You are worthy. Exactly as you are. Radical acceptance of your body is a confidence booster. You’ll walk taller and lighter without the weight of society’s impossible expectations holding you back. This itself can be a lifelong journey for some of us, so please reach out for help and support.
Taking imperfect action toward your goals
Action is key. You must do the thing! It does not have to be perfect. “Done is good.” is a mantra I’ll tell myself when things feel overwhelming. Or, when they feel like I’ll never make the progress I expected. “Maybe I should just take one more look at that first.” or, “I can’t make that public just yet, it’s not perfect.” You do NOT have to have every single step mapped out. You also don’t have to even know what all of the future steps are! You DO have to take one though. Procrastination, analysis paralysis, and just being too anxious about the way something could change our lives…these can all stand in the way of our dreams. Like Anna says in Frozen 2, “just do the next right thing.” You’re welcome.
Establishing self-care routines
I wrote about this a little bit last month discussing healing from codependency, but please know that self-care is also an ongoing practice. First, be sure your most basic needs are met: Food, water, shelter, sleep, movement, etc. Then, you can make sure you have the social and intellectual stimuli you need to feel more connected to yourself and the world around you. Self-care is not all bubble baths, blowouts, and mani-pedis. Do that if it makes YOU feel more boss, of course. But, also, make sure you make the time for the things that truly nourish your soul. This will make all of your endeavors more fruitful. And, it will help make your LIFE that much more awesome.
Finding Fulfillment is Possible. And, Maybe Even Fun?
Of course, these could probably each be posts on their own. And, maybe they will be soon! But, they are also not things I’m expecting you to figure out all on your own. Yes, you are a brilliant, accomplished woman who can and has done incredible things. But, this stuff is tough! Especially when you’ve got a million other things on your mind. So, reach out. Let me help. If you’re anywhere in the state, I can help with online therapy in Florida. If you’re here in Broward County, give me a call! Let’s figure this out. Start living your life of fulfillment, sister. You’re so worth it.
Begin Therapy for Women in Florida
If you are looking for a therapist who specializes in helping women, I am here to support you. Let’s get you feeling more fulfilled and full of life. To begin counseling in-person or online therapy for women in Florida, follow these three steps:
Contact Counseling Solutions of Boward to schedule your free 20-minute consultation on a video platform,
Meet with me, Enid and let’s get started!
Finally, feel the fulfillment you’ve been searching for.
Other Services Offered at Counseling Solutions of Broward:
Enid De Jesus offers a variety of mental health services for women at her counseling clinic in Broward County, FL. Her goal is to create lasting transformative change and growth in your life. So, she offers anxiety treatment, depression treatment, counseling for imposter syndrome, after divorce counseling, relationship counseling for one, and co-dependency treatment. For more information on counseling, please check out her what to expect page or contact her counseling office.